Doubt and fear. Fear and doubt. Oh how these two little doozies just keep rearing their ugly heads at me this week. Especially big "Dizzy-D". Doubt. It seems Big D just keeps bullying her way into all facets of my life. (Note the lack of personal responsibility here.) I doubt my ability to teach a good class... I worry about what my students think... I doubt that they like me... I doubt that I'm worthy to teach... I doubt I'm good enough... Ahhh - you've heard that one before. Those two, infamous words that so many of us hold so close to our hearts that we might as well just get them tattooed there. We surrender so much of the Power of Living our Best Lives to the toxicity of Doubt. Yup - self sabotage at it's finest. I know I'm not alone in this one - we really are our worst enemies aren't we?
But where does Doubt come from? Why did we invite her in? She's like your best friends annoying little sister who was 2 years younger than you. Remember her? Remember how you just didn't want to play with her but your mom told you to 'play nice' so you kept her around but instead (sneakily) changed the rules so that instead of playing with her, you would constantly be running away from her? Isn't that essentially what we're still doing though - running away from 'her'? And where is that getting us other then to feed that belt of anxiety we sport like a life preserver around our solar plexus? Oh sigh - to think that we could be Free.
Let's stand in possibility for a moment. What if... you heeded your mothers advice (for once.) What if you made friends with your best friends annoying little sister? (I know - I can hear the whiny "But Mommmm" hanging in the air now.) What if instead of running away from Doubt we befriended her? What if she's just like us? Full of hopes and fears and annoying little sibblings of her own? Is it possible that instead of covering Doubt with mantras of: "I think I can. I like myself. I am good enough." we harnessed her power on our side. As our friend. So instead of working against us, she worked with us. As part of us. Enabling us to be more authentic. More real. More ME. Not to give into her, but to befriend her.
And that's really how you make friends and get people to like us anyways isn't it? The vulnerability of being authentic.
"The greatest fear in the world is of the opinions of others. And the moment you are unafraid of the crowd you are no longer a sheep, you become a lion. A great roar arises in your heart, the roar of freedom" -Osho 'Courage The Joy of Living Dangerously'
But where does Doubt come from? Why did we invite her in? She's like your best friends annoying little sister who was 2 years younger than you. Remember her? Remember how you just didn't want to play with her but your mom told you to 'play nice' so you kept her around but instead (sneakily) changed the rules so that instead of playing with her, you would constantly be running away from her? Isn't that essentially what we're still doing though - running away from 'her'? And where is that getting us other then to feed that belt of anxiety we sport like a life preserver around our solar plexus? Oh sigh - to think that we could be Free.
Let's stand in possibility for a moment. What if... you heeded your mothers advice (for once.) What if you made friends with your best friends annoying little sister? (I know - I can hear the whiny "But Mommmm" hanging in the air now.) What if instead of running away from Doubt we befriended her? What if she's just like us? Full of hopes and fears and annoying little sibblings of her own? Is it possible that instead of covering Doubt with mantras of: "I think I can. I like myself. I am good enough." we harnessed her power on our side. As our friend. So instead of working against us, she worked with us. As part of us. Enabling us to be more authentic. More real. More ME. Not to give into her, but to befriend her.
And that's really how you make friends and get people to like us anyways isn't it? The vulnerability of being authentic.
"The greatest fear in the world is of the opinions of others. And the moment you are unafraid of the crowd you are no longer a sheep, you become a lion. A great roar arises in your heart, the roar of freedom" -Osho 'Courage The Joy of Living Dangerously'
Wow, this post came at a PERFECT time for me, thank you Christi! Entering into the school year as a new teacher I have been swimming - no, drowning - in doubt. Thank you for the change in perspective!
ReplyDeleteIt's YOU, it's YOU, it's YOU, my beautiful friend! How are you lovely? xxxxx
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